Hello loves,
I have been doing a lot of thinking these past few days, and
I wanted to do a post about what has been running through my mind.
I am nineteen years old, and I feel like I haven’t
accomplished very much in my life. I am from a teeny tiny town in the middle of
the United States, and I haven’t checked many things off my “life goals list.” Watching
YouTubers and bloggers that travel all around the world makes me feel as though I’m lacking
in life experiences. Traveled out of the country? Hasn’t happened. Visited the
big cities in the US? I was in LA last year (it was perfect, by the way!), but
I haven’t done that either. Even starting a YouTube channel? Only a dream.
But this year I want to change this.
I am a nervous person by nature, which is why I have always
been afraid to push myself. I didn’t take photography classes because I thought
I wasn’t going to be good at it. Now I’m interested in photography and wish I would
have had learned basics earlier on so I could be taking better photos now. I
was too scared to learn an instrument, but now I’m wishing I would have learned
guitar because I just love that instrument. It’s probably my favorite, and now
I would have to start as a beginner. At my age? You can’t teach an old dog new
tricks…
Well, this is all going to change, starting now. Last
spring, I decided on where I was going to college and what I wanted to do.
Instead of going to college for something “safe,” I’m going for magazine
journalism and English. I love to write, and I’ve learned so much from my first
year at college already. I know there aren’t heaps of jobs in journalism, but I
figured I need to pursue what I want, and so far I am in love with my decision.
After graduation, my parents are hoping that I stay close. I
appreciate my small town roots. These experiences helped me become the person I
am today, but I’m looking forward to exploring. I love to travel, but I have
hardly had the opportunity to see what this big world has in store. I’ll have
mounds of debt, but I’ve decided to just move somewhere I’ve always wanted.
Right now, I have my sights set on LA, NYC, or London. I’ve never been to New
York or London, but I’m planning on studying abroad in London next spring (I
can’t wait!). I can’t hold back—I just need to do it. I’ll be 22 when I
graduate (which, is my golden birth age too—it’s gonna be a good year), and
that’s the perfect time to set my roots somewhere new.
My dream has always been to write for a fashion magazine,
and that is what I still aspire to do. I don’t want to give up on that. I just
want to keep on working hard to get there. I’m hoping to see my name on a
byline in Refinery 29, NYLON, or Company magazines. (A girl can dream, right?)
I’ve realized that this is the time in my life in which I need
to do what I want to do. I don’t want to look back 20 years from now and regret
not doing what I want. I’m planning on starting a YouTube channel this summer,
and I’m hoping to get all the funds I’ll need to study abroad next spring. Maybe
when I’m abroad I’ll get my hair done like Lou Teasdale’s at a Bleach salon,
maybe I’ll finally visit a city in the US that I haven’t been. I’m not sure
what that “thing” will be, but maybe I’ll just do it.
This is my final statement for you: do what you want, even
if that means doing something little tomorrow. Want to make a little splurge on
that makeup palette you have been eyeing for the past month? Always wanted to
ask that cute guy out (I have…)? Just do it! I need to push myself too. Maybe
that means saving up for that backpacking trip that you’ve always wanted to
take through Europe with your besties or a weekend in Cali. Just find a way to
make it work. Fight for it. And, most importantly, try not to regret anything.
You will make mistakes, but these mistakes will help you become an even
stronger woman.
I’m hoping to look back on this post a year from now and
smile. I’m hoping I can say, “Yes, I did that! I never thought I would!” I’m
sick of sitting back and wishing. I just need to do it.
Sorry about how long this is, but I just wanted to share my
recent “inspirations” with you all. I’m hoping I follow through with these
things, and I’m hoping you all can take a chance and follow what you want to do
too. What have you been holding back from doing? I would love to hear more
about what you aspire to do—maybe I can get some new ideas of things I’d like
to do one day too!
Thanks for reading,
Maggie D. xx
Here's a little edit I made from a photo I took on my way to LA last year.
P.S.: Check out Nina Nesbitt’s “Way in the World” if you
still feel like you’re trying to find yourself. I’m at that stage in my life,
and it basically sums it all up. I think you would like it J
